We decided that it was time the wee fella had a dog. A friend of a friend's dog just had a litter of 14 and was looking for a good home for them. Don't know if we comply with the elfin safety regulations for a "good home" but we'll give it a damn good try.
The pups are too young to be separated from their mother just yet, but because we are GOOD friends of a friend we got first pick.
When we walked in to the large kennel housing the doggy family, mum was feeding. I didn't know whether to look away or throw water over her screaming - NOooo, and she has 8 breasts!
(For those of you who are crap at irony - I read an article recently about a breast-feeding woman who had water thrown over her by an arsehole who - well, god only knows why these fuckwits behave the way they do.)
Anywho, the pups were a mass of writhing fur, latching on to a swollen teat while a brother/ sister tried to push it away. The wee fella looked at me and said, 'That looks cute and wrong all at the same time.'
The mummy labrador had 4 golden pups and 10 black ones. The wee fella decided he wanted a golden boy - dog is the correct term I believe - eeesh look at me, not even a dog owner yet and I know all the lingo.
The wee fella picked one of the livelier boys - see above - and is calling him Bob. Awwww.
While we wait for the pup, sorry Bob to open his eyes, grow a little more and get all his jags we have to come up with a Kennel Club name so that his pedigree can be registered. For those of you not in the know - excuse me while I act all superior - get me, doggy expert. I'll be on Dog Whisperer next week - the Kennel Club name has to be long-winded and dramatic. Like Roberto Dawnbreaker Persimmon Badinage. Or Lilly Shuttlebucket Apollo. Or perhaps even Sylvester Scraggyballs Breezebutt.
I'm struggling to pick one. I need something that suggests this dog is fun, lively, caring, comes from a good home and will never hump the legs of innocent bystanders.
Choices, choices...anybody got a good idea for Bob's Kennel Club name?
